The Totally True, Slightly Tragic Origin Story

It all started with a dream, a pile of pizza boxes, and a very questionable sense of purpose.
Follow the bizarre journey of a failed art teacher, his stoner son, and one very unrealistic sales goal.
This is how Vased & Confused came to be.

“That’s stupid. It’s never gonna work.” - Mom

“That’s absolutely brilliant.” - Dad

“Well, you asked for it.” - ChatGPT

“Your account has been flagged for suspicious activity.” - Shopify Support

“You guys need serious help.” - Our Neighbor